Saturday, October 10, 2009

Help Obama win the Heisman!

So I scheduled a bunch of posts yesterday, but was generally away from the computer for most of the day, and thus didn't get the news until last night that President Obama had been awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.

To be honest, after Al "Global Warming" Gore won the Peace Prize for his An Inconvenient Truth Powerpoint presentation-cum-documentary, I guess we shouldn't be too surprised with His Royal Teleprompterness' win yesterday. He did, after all, give a speech on nuclear disarmament at the UN recently. And actual accomplishments on the world stage are clearly no longer a prerequisite for winning the Nobel Peace Prize (See Gore, Al, above). So congratulations, your worshipfulness. Hopefully we won't have to widen the doors to the Oval Office so that your head can fit through.

I think the next great test for The Big O will be to convince the Nobel Committee that he, President King Obama should win all the Nobels next year. I figure passing ObamaCare should make him the frontrunner for the Nobel Prize in Medicine; Another "stimulus" package practically guarantees him the lock on the Economics prize (if Paul Krugman can win it, I guess anyone can).

Physics might be a problem -- after all, Al Gore invented the Internet, so he's obviously overdue. But Obama gave away control of it (why would we want to control the Internet, the world's greatest communications network, that we invented, after all?), so that might count. Or maybe that's another Peace prize. That leaves Chemistry. Admittedly, Obama's going to have to pull some rabbits out of a hat for that one ... which might qualify, come to think of it.

At any rate, that's all next year. This year, however, I see we now have a chance to help The World's Greatest President Human Being win the Heisman Trophy. Simply go here to cast your vote.

Evidently, you'll have to use the write-in candidate option, as mysteriously "Barack Obama" has been omitted from the list of named nominees (an "oversight" by those racists who run the Heisman voting, no doubt). Heck, all of the other nominees appear to be college football players, for goodness sakes. Nevertheless, I am confident that our Great Narcissist-in-Chief can rally the Heisman voters to his side with some help from his loyal subjects and a few well chosen words. Yes. We. Can. Although a game of touch football on the White House lawn wouldn't hurt.

P.S. The Anchoress has a more serious commentary on the Obama award here, with a link roundup to many others.

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